Why Do I Keep Having Nightmares About My Boyfriend’s Ex? 11 Possible Reasons!

Dreams reflect nice memories and also let us into an upcoming one. But they are not always nice, as some experiences in the outer world tend to affect or shape what see in our dreams.

When such effects turn bad, nightmares crawl into our minds and taunt us. Anybody can have nightmares, and you need explanations if a particular pattern keeps showing up.

Hence, if you keep having nightmares about your boyfriend’s ex then there are certain reasons, why this is happening.

This article will cover a list of 10 reasons and offer you answers to your question of why I keep having nightmares about my boyfriend’s ex.

10 Possible Reasons why you have nightmares about your boo’s ex

One of these explains why you keep having nightmares about your boyfriend’s ex. The reasons gathered in this post are well-thought-out and are from a broad sense of reasoning, coupled with testaments from previous victims.

  1. It shows you see her as a threat
  2. It means you might be jealous
  3. It indicates a full-blown insecurity
  4. It means your love life is not solid
  5. It emphasizes that you are an over-thinker
  6. It might be a possible vision
  7. It shows you’re overly attached to your boyfriend
  8. It can mean that you snatched her boyfriend
  9. It can indicate a bad plan on her end
  10. It might be a symptom of a sleeping disorder

It Shows You See Her as a Threat

Why Do I Keep Having Nightmares About My Boyfriend’s Ex

Why would you constantly have a nightmare of someone, let alone your partner’s ex, if you do not see such a person as a threat?

This point is also the reason why a child bullied in school would call out the name of his bully while having nightmares at home.

The reason is simply that the bully is a figure that resonates with the threat wherever he goes, and this awareness also plays with the kid’s consciousness, even in dreams.

The same thing is the reason why you will see your boyfriend’s ex in your dream, not just in your dream, but in a bad dream.

For a long time, dreams have been linked to the waking state and are said to be a manifestation of not only what we see but also what we perceive.

Therefore, if this ex of your boyfriend is a pain in the Back, there’s a tendency that you’ll have weird and unpleasant dreams about the person.

Nightmares in this context might involve seeing your boyfriend in her arms; resting his head on her bosom and probably looking all cool with the experience.

What a sore sight it must be for you, but that is a clear indication that you see her as a threat to your relationship.

It Means You Might Be Jealous

Why Do I Keep Having Nightmares About My Boyfriend’s Ex

Jealousy has its little but effective way of taking over the mind without prior notice or even a sign. It is a slow process of self-annihilation, which a lot of people are yet to fish out and get rid of.

Hence, its involvement in this context. An unchecked strand of jealousy can sprout into a full-on version and nasty experiences like nightmares are inevitable.

Enough of the philosophy lesson, my point is that if you are envious of the young woman’s life, achievement or growth, then you’ve just granted nightmares a plot in your dream.

It will not only act according to the role which your mind made for it, but jealousy will also fuel your nightmare to be worse and unbearable.

So, it would be in your best interest to conduct a self-evaluation test and find out the real reason why you detest the girl in question.

The evaluation test will include penning down what you feel about her, why you feel the way you do, and why it got this bad to the extent of nightmares.

After this test and you’re envious of her, then you might want to clear your chest, because it could be the reason why you are having all these unpleasant dreams about her.

It Indicates a Full-blown Insecurity

People have been killed due to feeling insecure. Others have ghosted their partners for a long time without a tangible reason but because they had a nudge that something wasn’t right.

This clearly shows that having nightmares is not the most dreadful experience that people have found themselves in due to insecurity in their relationship.

You can easily count a dream of your boyfriend’s ex on his bare chest as a nightmare because you are not sure if he’s yours or not. Maybe you don’t even trust him. Maybe he’s a chronic cheat and she might be the latest catch.

Why Do I Keep Having Nightmares About My Boyfriend’s Ex

All these thoughts point to an insecure mind, an unsure spirit, and a heart probably shattered by past relationships.

You might be nursing a bad feeling gotten from previous dealings with men, that prompted you to think something is wrong, thus the nightmares of seeing your boyfriend’s ex in a romantic mood with him.

It Means Your Love-life is not solid

Why Do I Keep Having Nightmares About My Boyfriend’s Ex

I have discovered that insecurities in a relationship do not always come up due to past relationships going wrong. Some of them sprung from poorly established relationships.

If you find yourself in one of these relationships, there are chances you will question the movement and judgment of your partner.

Once you start questioning and doubting, it extends to a broader chapter as you try to substantiate your claims of cheating.

Your boyfriend’s ex might be a factor of consideration, and when these claims become so clear from her end, you might start having reoccurring nightmares.

All these ill feelings happen to most ladies because they are not in a relationship that is firmly built on love, trust, and commitment.

Therefore, they get caught up in thoughts that can evolve into nightmares. So you might want to look at your current relationship. If it reeks of a shaky foundation, then it might be the problem.

It Emphasizes That You Are an Over-thinker

This is another reason why you might be having reoccurring nightmares about your boyfriend’s ex because you are overthinking. You might ask; Am I over-thinking? Is this what this is about?

Yes, it is what this is about and yes, you might be overthinking the whole thing. I have a friend who would shiver at the mention of sharks because his dad died from a shark attack on the beach and since then he doesn’t go to the beach.

On our last visit to Hawaii, I forced him to the beach, and later that day, at night, he had a nightmare of sharks eating him up.

Why Do I Keep Having Nightmares About My Boyfriend’s Ex

At first, it was serious because he was all sober and reclusive the following morning, but it was also hilarious because he was just overthinking the whole thing.

The same thing could be the case with you, as you might be over-thinking a lot of issues like if your boyfriend would back out on you for her.

What if she’s still in close touch with him? All these speculations are good enough to give you a shocking nightmare if you kept pondering on them.

It Might Be a Possible Vision

As much as I would love to remain irreligious in this subject matter, I won’t disagree that dreams can also send messages to us in a concealing format.

Since we’re talking about a nightmare which is a good dream turned bad, it is also possible that the message conveyed through the nightmare could also be an upcoming bad experience.

If you are constantly seeing your boyfriend’s ex in the same pattern of a nightmare, then there’s a possibility you’re seeing a vision of a bad experience involving her.

It could be anything, from an accident to a miscarriage or something as subtle as a job loss. If this is the case, then your nightmare is more about her than you, and you need to reach out to her if you guys are on good terms.

It Shows You’re Overly Attached to Your Boyfriend

Why Do I Keep Having Nightmares About My Boyfriend’s Ex

This is another determining reason why you keep having nightmares about your boyfriend’s ex. This reason borders on attachment and it is a very strong feeling which can erupt in nightmares if not checked.

It’s a show of love to be attached to your partner, but when this attachment becomes obsessive, stuff like nightmares of their previous exes is almost inevitable.

It is an indication that you want him all to yourself and you don’t want to share him with anybody.

You now see his ex as a breach of this achievement and bad thoughts start lodging in your mind to be unleashed at night in the form of nightmares.

This experience might get worse if he’s still on good terms with this said ex. You might’ve gotten more tensed up than usual, which led to the repetition of the nightmares.

So, a healthy attachment void of obsession can put an end to this rave of nightmares.

It Can Mean That You Snatched Her Boyfriend

Regrets, fears, and guilt are all factors that might explain why you keep having nightmares about your boyfriend’s ex.

If you feel guilty about something as disheartening as snatching your fellow woman’s boyfriend, then nightmares are just a show of what your guilty mind is about to unleash.

You’re having those nightmares because your conscience can no longer put up with the bad deed and is looking for a way to go out with its pains.

A culpable mind tends to feel unsafe and since you might’ve taken her boyfriend who you are currently dating; then you are likely to have nightmares about her.

Nightmares like being scolded or chased down the hallway by her can point to this point.

It Can Indicate a Bad Plan on Her End

Just like nightmares becoming visions, having one about your boyfriend’s ex can point to a possible evil plot by her.

This evil plan by her may not necessarily be against you, as it might also affect your boyfriend, especially if she’s still embittered that their relationship did not work out.

Your nightmares could be directly or indirectly pointing to the clues of her plot.

If you’re able to capture the events in the nightmare due to its repetition, note them and even write them down if you can.

There may be a need for you to revisit them someday, so do not see it as just a nightmare because your life, career, or relationship could be at stake.

It Might Be a Symptom of a Sleeping Disorder

Outside the subject of love affairs and relationships, you could be showing signs of a sleeping disorder.

This is more confirmed if your boyfriend’s ex is cool with your relationship with her ex and doesn’t give you any weird attitude to get all suspicious and fret about.

This sleeping disorder has to do with a condition known as ‘dream anxiety disorder. Some relationship non-related issues like trauma, sleep deprivation, hard drugs, and even stress cause the disorder.

Why Do I Keep Having Nightmares About My Boyfriend’s Ex

Medical officials documented that this disorder happens, especially in the REM stage of sleep. REM stands for Rapid Eye Movement; it is the moment during sleep when you gently and gradually pass out.

During this period, you might experience a difficult transition from a waking state to sleep, which now manifests as a nightmare. Those with this condition tend to see reoccurring patterns, signs, and people in their unpleasant dream (nightmares).

If none of the aforementioned points explains your nightmare condition, then you have to run a medical diagnosis to determine your status.


Just as all experiences of life have their connection with our day-to-day life, subconscious awareness such as dreams also has its connotation with the waking state.

When the dreams come off well, it is pleasant, but the contrary means nightmare. Having such an unpleasant experience with your boyfriend’s ex is sure to drive you nuts with thoughts, assumptions, and acclamations.

This article has provided you with laudable explanations and relative reasons why you might’ve had a such nightmare over and over again.

It also explored some of the ways through which you can determine your part in the event and how to put an end to this mind game.

I hope you find solace and peace with whatever information this post portrays.

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