Did you observe that the guys you’ve been seeing will play the romantic, genuine guy, but then after a couple of weeks or months of dating, after sleeping with you (or attempting to and you resented), they zoom off?
You may be pondering about what you might be doing wrong. You may now even be wondering if you are just the girl that guys want to sleep with.
Well, your instincts are right. In many situations, it’s more about you than it’s about these men.
I know, I know. You’ve reviewed your appearance and s*x talks. But it goes beyond that.
It’s important to remember that not all guys are only interested in sleeping with someone.
If you find that many guys you encounter seem to only be interested in a physical relationship, it could be a sign that you are looking in the wrong place or you’re giving off that impression.
Consider how you present yourself and what kind of signals you may be sending. It’s also important to prioritize your desires and boundaries.
Now, you may be thinking about your age as a factor in this situation. I cannot be correct about how old you are but chances are you just graduated from college in the last few years, nothing has changed about you, and you’ve just been having an unlucky run of bad guys.
The truth is that there are many guys out there who are only interested in sex and have no serious relationships. But why do you keep attracting these men? Here are possible reasons.
10 Reasons Why Guys You Meet Only Want To Sleep With You
You have decided to probe into this issue because you want to grow with someone and have fun – not only for casual Copulation .
But then, guys that come after you are only intent on sleeping with you. Look into these areas to identify why and how you can put a screeching halt to that.
1. You give off the same vibe from the onset.
You need to do a soul search and figure out if you’re great at keeping up with appearance.
When a guy who doesn’t want something serious comes your way, do you also pretend like you don’t want something serious just to keep things swinging when deep down inside, you want something serious?
Believe it or not, as far as relationships go, there are two types of men: those that want something serious and those who don’t.
If you, unfortunately, attract the latter, and you give off the same vibe from the onset, you’ll realize that the guys that come your way are only after sleeping with you. It means they easily get the impression that conveniently supports their intent.
I’m also going to let you in on one secret I realized a long time ago.
The secret is this: Guys who don’t want something serious have a way of sensing women who are not ready to settle down soon just as they are.
So when you give off that vibe, they instantly believe that you are someone easy to get into bed with. And, so they start playing the romantic guy till they have what they want.
For example, your typical conversation with these guys would center around the pleasure of being single but still getting physical.
If this sounds like the bedrock of your situation, then it’s time to resolve that you’ll steer away from any guy with commitment-phobic intent.
Note: You are not becoming a nun.
You are only streamlining your interest to only guys that are interested in a committed and healthy relationship just as you are.
2. You find it hard to say ‘no’ to these guys
Another possible reason why the guys you encounter want to sleep with you is that you don’t know how to say no. In this case, you are a little too nice but it’s taking a toll on your love life.
For example, when these guys come your way, you go on more dates with them and start enjoying the fun, but they are not interested in a serious relationship.
Perhaps, you like to be impressed by persistence. Unfortunately, that’s what these kinds of guys are looking for. They don’t take no for an answer and they keep running after you till you allow them in.
They then get into bed with you and that’s it – moving to the next lady who struggles to say no to guys.
When you sense that they don’t want something serious, you do yourself a lot of good by standing your ground and saying no.
If you find this hard to do, you may keep attracting them.
3. You don’t set the right boundaries
There’s the right time for everything in a relationship.
Timeliness in relationships matters so much that when some things come before others, it leads to the end of that union, depending on the connection of both parties. Physical intimacy is one of these things.
That is why you should know how to set the right boundaries when you encounter a new guy.
If you’ve not put a thought into this, it may account for why the guys you’ve been meeting only want to sleep with you.
It even starts with knowing your boundaries and how to enforce them.
At every stage in a relationship, you need the right amount of space to feel comfortable.
An excellent example of these boundaries is moving in with the guy or the other way around, engaging in sensitive conversations with the person, and sending impressions with Suggestive undertones at the earlier stage of the relationship.
If you don’t set boundaries on these factors earlier, guys who want something casual can come in and take advantage of the fact that there are no rules to follow.
So how do you set boundaries to make sure that the guys you meet henceforth are not just only interested in sleeping with you?
First, you need to know what you need in a relationship and the space you need for comfort.
How do you want to guard yourself against bad experiences? Certain boundaries can help you with that.
Also, what boundaries will help you and the guy enjoy the relationship without necessarily bringing the pleasure of lovemaking to the equation too early? That’s about that.
4. What you talk about versus what you want
It could be that guy only wants to sleep with you because you don’t walk your talk. And this has become a common reason as far as this issue goes.
Here’s what I mean: you are not interested in guys who want something casual only.
But when you begin a conversation with a guy hitting on you, what topic do you choose to talk about, especially for the first time? What kind of ideas do you give them to feed on?
Even if you like the guy so much, don’t be quick to express it all.
In a bid to express your profound love to your new guy, you may unintentionally send the impression that you just want to get into bed with him and that’s all.
Back to your first impression because that’s what releases the chart of the course of the relationship right off the bat.
Guys don’t easily forget how you look, what you say, and the body language you give in the first contact. They read the meaning of these ideas and conclude on your intent with them.
The focus point is to give him clear ideas about what you want (if you are to consider a relationship.)
So, it’s not enough to walk your talk. Also, talk about your walk.
5. The dressing….really?
If you’ve been wondering why guys only want to sleep with you, it’s time you put a thought into your choice of clothing.
I know. Don’t get me wrong. It’s not all about appearance.
But really, your clothing can tell people the kind of relationship you’re looking for even without you saying a word.
So when the guys you come across read the meaning of your consistent choice of dressing whenever you’re around them, they get the wrong impression.
Everyone has a vibe and one’s distress reflects that vibe.
If you are used to revealing cleavages in your choice of clothing, guys tend to get the impression that you are easy to get in bed with. (For obvious reasons)
They’d want to take advantage of that when you eventually allow them in.
So you may say it’s not all about the dressing.
It’s not.
But your outward appearance matters, as far as this situation goes.
6. You size guys up on the surface
If guys only want to sleep with you, it could be that you have had the chance to encounter ones with serious intentions but you’ve sieved them out based on surface factors.
When this happens repeatedly, one can conclude that you have eyes for bad guys.
Here’s an excellent example of a self-assessment:
Would you be quick to label a guy with a tattoo and piercing as a “fun guy” and then another with a charming appearance as a “responsible father”? That’s actually where it started.
If you are laser-focused on finding something new, you may forget what you want.
Be open-minded. Guys with serious intentions are not labeled on the forehead. Neither are the non-serious guys.
So the next time you meet a guy, be able to determine if he’s a fun distraction for you at that moment or something you see going with you in the long run.
Once you are firmly planted on what you want, and you take precise actions to support your interest when guys come your way, things will fall in place and you won’t have to deal with the guys who just want casual lovemaking.
7. Are you making assumptions based on bad experiences in your past?
Another most likely reason why guys you encounter seem to only be interested in sleeping with you is that you are the one making assumptions based on bad experiences in your past.
These assumptions have now accumulated to augment your belief that every guy that comes your way is interested in going to bed with you.
I’m not invalidating the fact that some men only want sex (and your chance of coming across them as an attractive lady is high)
But it also happens for the other gender and the bottom line is that everyone seeks love and pleasure.
You may have had a heart-breaking experience with a few guys in the past who did not want anything but casual lovemaking but that does not mean every man that comes your way has the same agenda.
We talked about setting boundaries earlier. You can use this as a sign to know if a guy has ulterior motives when he constantly attempts to breach the boundaries just to get into you.
8. You are meeting with guys in the wrong places
How could you not have thought about the situation this way?
If you figure that guys are only interested in sleeping with you, you can review how you meet these guys.
It may dawn on you that you’ve been looking in the wrong place.
You can find love anywhere. (I found to love most interestingly)
But there are wrong places to look at if you are looking for a guy that has a serious thing with you.
Some locations are hookup-oriented and not a hub for matching future couples.
The past guys that played the romantic, sincere guys and eventually moved to sleep with you…where did you meet them? Bars? Clubs? Online dating sites?
Take a few steps backward and look at the situation. Connect the dots.
These are not 100% ideal places to find guys that are not only after s*x.
With the growth of technology and the internet space, it has become easier than ever to meet single men who are only intent on something casual, or temporary.
When you look in the wrong places, you keep getting guys that automatically assume you want to get laid.
So they make you feel ‘loved’ for a while before offering to sleep with you. And then, off they go.
9. You compromise standards
Another thing you need to reflect on if you find out guys only want to sleep with you is the standard you set relationship-wise and how often you compromise them.
For example, if you are the lady that falls for every other guy who throws in even the cheesiest compliment, it will be hard to tell who is worth your attraction and who isn’t.
If you want these awful experiences to stop, you need to learn to maintain your standards.
I have used “learn” because it doesn’t become solid overnight but the decision can be made in an instant.
Now that I’ve mentioned that, I should also add that you don’t have to be rude or show off your attitude to every guy that comes your way and finds you attractive.
The point is that you don’t adjust to your standards until you are convinced he’s the guy for you.
10. It’s them; not you
Lastly, you need to remember that you’re not alone in this situation.
There are as many ladies also having to deal with coming across men who only want to sleep with them too.
Unfortunately, the number of women who have repeatedly fallen into this trap is more than those trying to navigate out of the circle.
If you’ve done a deep soul search and realized none of the possible reasons listed above connect with you and your lifestyle, then it’s more about the men you meet.
You should know that men process matters relating to emotions differently than women. As a result, they don’t see love the way you do.
Except in distinct cases, men will expect more s* gratification and physical expression of affection rather than emotional connection.
You will need to understand this part of men to be able to make a distinction when men come your way.
Wrapping up
No matter what the reason is, it all boils down to the fact that these guys you meet quickly get the impression that it’d be easy to sleep with you. It could be that you have it once and it was all it took.
So even when you don’t dress or behave extra (intimacy-wise), men may still come your way with the sole intention of sleeping with you.
Many ladies do give their bodies to guys to win approval. But when one looks deeply, it’s the reverse. You are attractive. But only that you are friends with the wrong sort of guys.
My two cents, above all? Try changing your social environment, girl.
For instance, the chances of finding serious guys become slimmer when you only hang out in bars or do drugs (for example)