Pick Me Girl vs Tomboy: What Is the Major Difference? (Here’s What We Know)

You might’ve come across a couple of people who seem weird or rather different from the rest of the social makeup of the human race. Well, I used “different” because I feel “weird” is too heavy a word to be used in this scenario.

However, an example of this type of “different” breed is the pick-me girl, and there’s the other one that fascinates me the more…tomboy.

There have been several words out there in the streets on what these terms mean and stand for, to the extent that what we now have are doctored details and nothing substantial.

I’ll be stepping in to clear the fog as I will be discussing in detail the major difference between these two. Happy reading y’all!

What Is the Major Difference between a Pick Me Girl and Tomboy?

The difference between a pick-me girl and a tomboy is that a pick-me girl employs a greater amount of feminine attitude and behavioral display than other girls and even much more than a tomboy. 

She combines these attitudes to try and stand out from the other girls and as such attracts the attention of guys.

On the other hand, a tomboy develops and shows masculine characteristics than other girls. But unlike a pick-me girl, a tomboy has no intentions of attracting the opposite gender (guys) in the light of initiating a sensual relationship with the person.

Instead, her attractiveness to the opposite gender stems from her show of masculine traits.

On that note, I deduced that the major difference between a pick-me girl and a tomboy is the opposite nature of the desirable traits portrayed by either of them.

Who Is a Pick Me Girl?

Pick Me Girl vs Tomboy

A pick-me girl is any female that tends to put off other girls to present herself as more desirable to guys.

She employs appearing more girly, portraying submissiveness as her strong point while taking bold steps to attract the attention of guys.

In other to achieve this, a pick-me girl often ends up criticizing other women and whatever philosophy of feminism that they uphold. She bemoans the woke culture and makes sure that she acts differently from other girls.

Moving on; any girl who is identified as a pick-me girl often talks about how low it costs to be a woman. She is a literal low-maintenance woman and tries to use this trait as an advantage over other girls.

This she does, believing that guys would prefer spending less to impress a girl than spending more just to end up in the friend zone.

Because of all these arrays of highly feminine portrayals, most pick-me girls are often hated and seen as hostile individuals amongst other women.

To these other girls, ‘she just wants to be seen’ and wants others to become ‘second class citizens’.

Amid all of these claims, a pick me girl remains more of a derogatory term used to get back at any girl that guys like the most, other than the personality showcased by someone.

I know this because I overheard some high school students in the local library some days ago slut-shaming another girl that passed by while labeling her as a pick-mee girl.

The truth is, the girl in question might have just shown a quarter of everything a pick-me girl is known for.

Who Is a Tom Boy?

Pick Me Girl vs Tomboy

A tomboy is a girl that shows extremely masculine character display. Judging by this definition, the assertion that a tomboy is the opposite of a pick-me girl, but not entirely true.

A tomboy is any girl that enjoys the company of guys more than that of her fellow girls. She’d rather mow the lawn than practice the new hack of applying makeup or watch Youtube tutorials on the best way to create an artificial cat eye. 

Most girls who are tomboys start expressing the traits naturally from childhood. And these show in the tone of their speech, dressing, and all-around behavioral pattern.

The fact that you might’ve seen one of these types of girls, means there’s a high chance that I’ve also come across them because I’m high on exploring the environment and its occupants (people and animals alike).

Well, I’ve seen and dined with one, and they’re amazing people.

The girl in question has good intent and is easygoing. Just like a general character pattern in most tomboys, she is also more likely to be found among guys other than girls.

She enjoys playing football and was even caught once teaching a guy how to woo another girl.

However, being a tomboy is often a phase of gender misrepresentation in childhood. It is not entirely an indicator of future sensual orientation. 

What Similarities Do They Share?

While the discussion of the differences between these two behavioral patterns goes on, it will be pertinent that you come to terms with how they’re similar.

This will help you have a better understanding of them and what to say when you try to explain them to anyone, no matter their level of understanding. 

On that note, the foremost similarity between these two is the fact that they both relate to women in some way. And that is because they’re both portrayed and identified as women. That is to say, only girls are either pick-me girls or tomboys.

They’re traits exclusive to the female gender, never to be shared by any male (instead, there are equivalent traits like these in males, but not exactly this).

Another similarity that exists between these two behavioral patterns is the fact that they’re jointly seen as unusual social patterns in society.

They are not normally seen as morally appropriate judging by the standard of a classic and traditional human society where all the new social orientations do not hold importance. 

How to Know You Are a Tom Boy?

The truth about being a tomboy is that the majority of those who have this trait do not know at the time that they do. They just go about trying so much to embrace their feminine side, and this often results in intense issues like depression and identity crises.

To make things balanced, there’s a need to discover on time the likelihood that a girl is a tomboy and then start managing the condition.

In this section of this article, I’ll be discussing how you can know that you are a tomboy. Let’s get to it already!

  • You like wearing male dresses and oversized clothes
  • You are likely obsessed with video games and sports
  • You’d rather keep male friends than females
  • You love rock and heavy metals music
  • You prefer going natural to applying makeup

1. You like Wearing Male Dresses and Oversized Clothes

One of the best ways you can know if you’re a tomboy is if you’d prefer wearing male dresses over female ones. You could be good in a gown, but would always prefer to jump on trousers for any occasion.

In addition to that, if you’re also a big fan of wearing oversized clothes with the excuse of being comfortable, it could also be that you’re a tomboy. 

2. You Are Likely Obsessed With Video Games and Sports

Pick Me Girl vs Tomboy

As I mentioned earlier on, I’ve had an encounter with a tomboy and as I recalled, she loved sports. This girl was good with football that she even brought her talent in a video game to the field on a few occasions.

This show of interest, even more, cemented her position as a tomboy in the eyes of people and even herself. 

So, if you find out that you have similar interests to her in sports, there’s a high chance you are a tomboy. 

3. You’d rather keep Male Friends than Females

If you feel that you’re more comfortable staying around boys than girls, you might as well be a tomboy. If you feel the slightest of any type of boyish vibe then feminine you could also be a tomboy. 

4. You Love Rock and Heavy Metals Music

Any girl who also prefers rock music and heavy metals over regular RnB or blues might as well be a tomboy. Therefore, if you think you have more interest in these types of music then you could be one.

5. You Prefer Going Natural to Applying Makeup

Pick Me Girl vs Tomboy

If you also prefer going natural to applying make-up, you could also be a tomboy.

It is a good indication, including leaving your hair undone which also points towards you being a tomboy because it is a boyish attitude, unlike girls who always want to look perfect with makeup and done hair.

Is It Bad to Be a Tom Boy?

No, it is not bad. There’s no moral standpoint of either positive or negative regarding being a Tomboy. This is because it is not proven that being one determines your sensual orientation.

In addition, being a tomboy is just unusual but that doesn’t mean that those who have this behavioral pattern have an abnormality of character display.

Being a tomboy is nothing more than a social orientation that is different from the traditional social standards of girls to girly acts and boys to their traits.

Is It Bad to Be a Pick Me Girl?

It is bad to be a pick-me girl. This is because it is dangerous and can bring enmity between a girl and other females

It is also bad because the person indirectly involves in extreme misogyny, which is also proved as a morally detrimental act to the welfare of the women in society.

If you know any girl who is or you think you’re showing traits like this, you should seek ways to disassociate from the act.

Parting Words

We’ve come to the end of this post, which discussed the difference between a tomboy and a pick-me girl. Alongside, I had the honor of walking you through who is either of these characters and how to spot them.

The moral judgment concerning these characters is an unsettled debate, so my stand of making either of them good or bad is just personal prejudice (you may still have your reservations).

In light of any suggestions or particular questions, the comment section is open for you to let us know what you think.                                               


1 thought on “Pick Me Girl vs Tomboy: What Is the Major Difference? (Here’s What We Know)”

  1. Where I agree that pick me girls are bad but you’re definition of what makes a tomboy is not good.

    The tomboy isn’t even all that boyish they are still conventionally feminine.

    In the photo you pick of the women is still feminine and has makeup on. What’s the point?

    The word ” tomboy” is useless and outdated nowadays

    There are plenty of women is sports and videos games. to point why even call the girl a tomboy at that point if she into them. I like games and plan to play in some sports. I don’t like watching them though. But I never considered myself as a tomboy.

    I like rock too but I never thought of that a “masculine” that I would be a tomboy for liking it. And how is RnB and Blues feminine? that a you don’t think a tomboy would like it? What about Pop?

    Do you think guys in general like just Rock? In reality that’s not the case. Men in general can like all kinds of music.

    It’s just a personal preference. Has nothing to do with gender

    I feel like you’re making these up.

    And the make up thing I know women who are normally feminine and don’t wear makeup ALL the time. That point is over exaggerated. And there are “tomboys” who do wear makeup

    And a side note people who wear makeup don’t do it to just be “Perfect” they do because it’s fun and they can.Because it’s their choice. no need to bring them down
    I never been a fan of makeup not because I’m a tomboy. I just never felt comfortable wearing
    but who knows? I might where it in the future


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