Why Does My Boyfriend Yell at Me Over Small Things? 5 Possible Reasons!

Anger can be consuming. It is one feeling that can make the sweetest of humans bitter. It leaves us thinking about why people act the way they do.

Nonetheless, getting upset tends to be a common human nature, and everybody has one way or the other showed this.

But things get a bit different if your loved one gets upset with you over little things. In this context, we’ll be looking at why your boyfriend yells at you over little things.

While having misunderstandings as couples are normal, it is abnormal to get yelled at by your boyfriend over minimal issues.

Because of this abnormality, your experiences require an explanation and this post will provide one and also guide you on how to manage the circumstance.

5 Reasons Why My Boyfriend Yell at Me Over Small Things

You can consider any of the following as a possible reason why your boyfriend yells at you over small things. While most of these issues are related to your bond with him, others are also personal.

The factors for this occurrence include.

  1. It shows that he is impatient
  2. It indicates his abusive attitude
  3. It speaks of his insecurity
  4. It might be that he is jealous
  5. It could also mean that he’s unforgiving

It Shows That He Is Impatient

Why Does My Boyfriend Yell at Me Over Small Things

To answer the question of why your boyfriend yells at you over small things, I need you to understand the relationship between impatience and anger.

They both are so related that one becomes the undoing of the other.

Your boyfriend is probably an impatient person who would rather get furious at the waiter than wait for his burger to get done.

The type of person who doesn’t want to get delayed and is kinda and always on the move. The same kind of people gets the worried most in bad traffic.

Why Does My Boyfriend Yell at Me Over Small Things

If he exhibits any of these attitudes which I just pictured, then he’s impatient. Oftentimes, this attitude is inherent, not learned, and it eats deep into the marrows of the individual. It leaves those around them in total bewilderment, just like you are now.

If he screams at the top of his voice because you were two minutes late to the dinner date, he’s impatient. If his routine in the morning entails having you skip your makeup session to avoid his yelling, he’s impatient.

If your boyfriend talks badly about you because you served breakfast a bit late, he’s impatient and you better reconsider what you signed up for since you’re not yet married.

It Indicates His Abusive Attitude

Years of hidden flaws can get exposed with a silly attitude. You can discover that a man who thinks he doesn’t snore does snore when he gets drunk.

The same applies to a man with an abusive attitude. He’s a character to be avoided. To fit into society, he might sulk it up and play cool.

But nothing ever stays hidden for long, so you might start to see attitudes that confirm such foul attitudes.

So if your boyfriend yells at you over small things, it could be a sign that he has an abusive attitude up his sleeves which he has probably been hiding.

Why Does My Boyfriend Yell at Me Over Small Things

Sometimes yelling between partners is common, but when it gets consistent and bad enough you might start wondering how such a sweet person turned bad.

If your boyfriend screams at you to the point of attempting to assault you, then it shows you how abusive he can be.

Another similar experience is yelling while depriving you of essential things like food and water. If the telling gets to the point where he forcefully sleeps with you, it just further proves his beast-like manner.

It shows that he has anger issues and it could erupt into a full-on abusive relationship if you do not take action and call things to order.

It Speaks of His Insecurity

Insecurity is another explanation as to why your boyfriend yells at you over small things.

He’s probably not feeling reassured by your love or the bond between you guys, so he comes up with attitudes like yelling to make his pains known. But because he never gets verbal about it, you barely know about this.

Why Does My Boyfriend Yell at Me Over Small Things

I’ve known most men to be strangely concealing, even up to their feelings, emotions, and thoughts. I often link this behavior to the general belief that a man shouldn’t be out with his feelings.

To say less and also convey his insecurity, your boyfriend might resort to using minimal things to yell at you.

This could be the case if you guys recently argued about an ex who wants to come back or about a guy who insisted on getting your number at the mall. Issues like this brooded insecurity and subsequently the yelling.

It Might Be That He Is Jealous

Another possible reason why your boyfriend acts in the manner he does over insignificant things says a lot about his inner feelings.

Jealousy is too big a bad feeling to engineer countless and consistent yelling over small things. Jealousy often forms the bedrock of insecurity.

Why Does My Boyfriend Yell at Me Over Small Things

So if he’s not insecure now, then he’s probably jealous. He’s jealous of the guy who smiled kindly at you.

He might be jealous of how your male best friend holds your hands while in public.

He might be resenting the idea of you wearing a certain type of dress because he doesn’t want to have men looking at you with eyes as though they were made in Paris.

To show this without being verbal about it, he might use yelling over small things as a channel.

It Could Also Mean That He’s Unforgiving

Why Does My Boyfriend Yell at Me Over Small Things

I will out with this factor because I’m culpable for it. Some time ago, during Christmas, I had an issue with my girlfriend due to an act that would’ve seen our end. I didn’t allow for the break-up and I couldn’t get myself to forgive her entirely.

In the following months, I started giving her attitude and the unnecessary yelling began, and before a month or two was over, she was already having enough of my attitude.

But instead of leaving, which I expected, she took us to a therapist who counseled us and I had the chance of relieving myself of the resentment.

This could be your circumstance. Your boyfriend could still be upset that you took his credit card without telling him or you didn’t step in for him when he needed it most and he sees yelling at you over little things as a way of telling you that he’s still furious at you.

This point relates to unforgiveness, so if you sense any attitude that points to it, then my guess is right.

What Can You Do if Your Boyfriend Yells at You Over Small Things?

Now we have seen some of the reasons why your boyfriend yells at you over small things. It’s time you know what to do to counter this ill-act.

Your actions are not meant to be too forward or hasty, hence our tips are both considerate and timely.

  1. You have to remain calm
  2. You should try talking things over
  3. You can get better with quick corrections
  4. You shouldn’t give him a reason to doubt you
  5. You can organize an Anger Management therapy session
  6. You should know when to call it quits

You Have To Remain Calm

Staying calm should be your first and foremost action in this kind of circumstance. I have learned from experience that talking back at an angry person fuels the anger and leads to unpleasant happenings.

To avoid further yelling, which might lead to domestic violence, you should endeavor to maintain your peace, and if it gets bad; leave the premise!

You Should Try Talking Things Over

Why Does My Boyfriend Yell at Me Over Small Things

After trying to stay calm and not overact, you can try to talk things over with him. You should do this when he’s cool and not flared up as usual; at least he might explain why he’s hard on you lately.

I know some couples who settled their difference during talks over a glass of wine and probably passionate kisses to relieve the tension in the air.

So you try this, prepare a good dinner and set up the table. Get him to the dining table and have him drink from a bottle of finely brewed wine. Serve him the meal and watch him eat.

If he insists that you must join him, then you have a chance to table your issues and have him listen. If he still wants you, he’ll apologize and come out with ill feelings.

You Can Get Better With Quick Corrections

We agreed that impatience could be a factor why your boyfriend yells at you over small things and to put an end to that, you have to start doing things right to avoid the yelling.

This includes serving dinner on time, minimizing the time spent on applying make-up, and also being punctual to dates.

With some of these changes in place, I’m sure we’ll tag a ‘check’ on the issue of impatience because he will stop being loud about your shortcomings.

You Shouldn’t Give Him a Reason to Doubt You

This tip is for you if you figured out that your boyfriend’s problem is coming from a place of insecurity.

If he feels insecure, jealous, and absentminded, then you should reassure him of your love, commitment, and attention by ridding him of any reason for him to doubt you.

Doing this will make him more calm and considerate because he knows he has you all to himself and is not sharing you with anybody.

You Can Organize an Anger Management Therapy Session

If handling things on your own, while implementing the tips already mentioned would be bad and ineffective.

Then I guess you’ll be needing the services of a therapist. You can set an appointment for a counseling session with him and have the therapist talk about his anger management issue.

This is because your boyfriend might be having a medical condition that triggers the yelling even over the slightest of things.

Why Does My Boyfriend Yell at Me Over Small Things

It is the work of the therapist to decipher this from his words and actions during the session and also relate with you on what to do.

If this is in the affirmative, you should then encourage him to be frequent with the therapy to help him reset this ailment and become the once-sweet person you know.

You Should Know When to Call It Quits

Just as the caption reads, ‘You should know when to call it quits.’ Some people never change on their own and you cannot help them to do either. They’re rather hell-bent on whatever bad attitude they portray.

They feast on your fear, on your disappointment, and are ecstatic that they can inflict that much pain on you. If your boyfriend is toxic and has an abusive attitude, then you’d have to get out of the relationship while you still have your sanity intact.

You can only do this if all the tips mentioned here fail to liberate him and put genuine smiles on his face. Leaving him won’t be easy, but it will be worth it in end.

You will see every reason to have left because instead of becoming more relatable, he might turn into a completely toxic person and taunt you with domestic violence.

If you don’t want any of that from happening, then knowing when to call it quits, is your ticket out of a such relationship.


Inspiring! That’s one word to describe this post, isn’t it? At least, you now know that having your boyfriend yell at you over some minimal and insignificant things is certainly a character to be questioned.

You now know possible reasons why he does this and also your part in the whole puzzle. I have also offered you tips on how to contain this problem to avoid a breakup or worse, an abusive relationship.

But just like I opined if all of these tips fail to appease him and make him the sweet person you’ve known. Then knowing when to put an end to the relationship becomes your final resolution.

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