Boyfriend Stays Out Late And Doesn’t Call

It’s mostly uncaring boyfriends who would want to do this to their girlfriends. If it is something that happened just once and he apologized with good reasons for not calling, then there’s no big issue.

But, if your boyfriend stays out late and doesn’t call you, even when you call him or ask him, he doesn’t give you any acceptable reason, then there’s a problem there. 

Why Does He Stay Out Late But Doesn’t Call?

My Boyfriend stays out late and doesn't call

He Has No Respect For You 

My Boyfriend stays out late and doesn't call

When a man refuses to be accountable in his relationship, he simply lacks respect for the person he is dating. Look at your parents’ relationship, are you convinced that your dad respects your mum?

A man who not only loves you but respects you will want to spend more time with you. The excuse he might give might be that he is staying out with the boys.

That is understandable if it doesn’t happen often. But, if it happens often and he doesn’t even have the decency to put a call through to you, then he doesn’t respect you. 

Sometimes, women give men the liberty to treat them the way they like. He wouldn’t be acting this way if you haven’t given him the chance to. 

If something keeps happening out of disrespect, it means you have stayed long enough to accept that habit as normal. It is obvious that he doesn’t respect you, you can choose what to do about that. 

If you are accountable to your boyfriend in that relationship, then he should be accountable to you as well if he respects you. 

He’s Telling You He’s No More Interested

Men have different ways of passing out a salient message to their spouse especially when they do not have the balls to face you regarding what they want to say. 

Your boyfriend could be trying to say that you are no longer his. That he is no more interested in you or in the relationship. He might also be on the fence of either letting you go or keeping you. 

It can be hard for some guys to break up with their girlfriends if the girlfriend has been particularly nice to them. He might be finding it difficult to tell you to leave. 

And so, with his actions, he’s trying to tell you to leave by yourself. I am sure that you wouldn’t want to stay where you are not wanted. 

It is even more obvious that he wants out if you call him yourself while he’s out there overnight and he doesn’t take your calls nor return them.

It is pretty easy to know if a man is no more interested in a relationship and this is one of the things they do. By now, you should weigh your place in that relationship and decide what to do about that. 

He Was With Another Woman

As difficult as this is to accept, this is 60% one of the reasons your boyfriend stayed out late and didn’t call you. This is probably the first thing you should consider before any other thing. 

Your boyfriend wouldn’t want to call you when he’s in the company of another woman or women. He wouldn’t want you to hear what’s going on in the background. 

You shouldn’t take it kindly if this happens more than twice. You are being played and you are in turn playing the good mistress. Find out what’s going on. 

You will know this if he comes home wearing a fresh smell, stains of lipstick on his shirt or face. Most times, he will act guilty. Unless he is a pro at that, his actions towards you when he’s back will tell you what he was doing out late.

Sometimes, women want to lie to themselves and pretend that this is not a possibility. They want to believe by all means that he wasn’t with another woman.

And, the reason you are still with him even though you have suspicions is that you really do love him and he’s using that to his advantage. As powerful as love is, you can choose not to be hurt. 

He Doesn’t Love You

This is a truth that is difficult to accept. Most women who are really desperate to be in a relationship will not want to accept that their boyfriends don’t love them even when it is glaring. 

I see no reason why a man who loves and respects you will not call you when something important is keeping him out late. Even if his battery is down, he can use that of his friend. 

That is what a boyfriend who loves you will do. Ideally, a boyfriend who loves you can’t wait to be with you, not to think of hearing your voice. 

If you want to be truthful to yourself from all the signs he’s been giving you, you will realize that he doesn’t love you anymore. Maybe he loved you at the beginning, but that’s not the reality now. 

Another way you will know this is if he had been calling you when he stayed late at the beginning of your relationship. Or he might not even dare stay out late from the outset. 

A lot has changed. He has changed. You need to accept that he doesn’t love you anymore and he doesn’t want to let you go because he’s benefiting from you. 

He’s Hiding Something From You

On the other hand, your boyfriend may love and respect you so much and he still wants to date you, but he might be hiding something from you. 

It might be a surprise package, a transaction he doesn’t want you to know at the moment, a new friend he’s seeing, a bad occurrence he doesn’t want you to be part of. It might be anything.

He is probably hiding something from you if you are certain of his love and respect. He might also be hiding the fact that he mistakenly got laid with another woman. 

He is not sure if you will forgive him, that’s why he didn’t call you and he didn’t come home early. He might be hiding something good or bad. You only need to wait to find out. 

You can think of this option if it just happened all of a sudden and it is not repeated. He might keep doing it if you do not find out what he’s hiding from you. 

What To Do When He Stays Out Late And Doesn’t Call

You have options of what to do when he begins to act this way. From beginning to love yourself more to moving out to talking to him to do the same thing also to dumping him. You have options. 

Love Yourself Unconditionally

Boyfriend Stays Out Late And Doesn't Call

I intentionally mentioned this option as first because this is the only thing that will enable you to make guided and proper decisions without hurting yourself. 

If your boyfriend is not giving enough love and respect, you owe yourself that. You will not really be hurt by his actions if you spend much time to love yourself. 

The reason why many girls are desperate in relationships is because they are looking for who to give them the love they lack when they can give themselves that. 

This may have sprung from a dysfunctional home where love is lacking and you are out to find that love by all means. Even if the guy is treating you like trash, you are content to stay. 

You have to realize that there’s no one that can love you like you. Apart from God who loves you more, you are your best lover. It is when you have fully loved yourself, that you will have the courage to do any of what I’ll say next. 

Move Out For A Moment

Yes! If you haven’t really done the first option, you wouldn’t want to consider this option. Baby girl, you have your whole life before you and you can’t waste that with a man who doesn’t care. 

Think of moving out, plan your life, get a degree, get a job and live your life the way you want it. Don’t let any man deprive you of that happiness just because he’s your boyfriend. 

You should consider this option if you are certain that he doesn’t love you anymore and he doesn’t respect you. You wouldn’t be seeing any of that if you were not living with him. 

Get your own apartment and live your life. Make new friends or get closer to your old friends and spend your time with them. Don’t be so clingy to not want anything for yourself and by yourself. 

This option might be hard if you are really into him, but it’s the best you could do to decide either to eventually dump him or keep dating him. 

Talk To Him About It

I am sure that you must have already done this before coming to find a solution to that. Sometimes it is not what we say that matters but how we say it. 

You should respectfully ask him why he stayed out late without calling and wait to hear his reasons. While listening, watch out for his posture and the way he answers you. That will give a hint to what is actually going on. 

You can talk to him again if he repeats it without giving an acceptable explanation. Let him know that you are hurt by his actions and that you do not appreciate it. 

He will end it if he loves you and doesn’t want you hurt. But, if after talking to him nothing is done from his end, then you can check other options. 

Do Same Or Pretend You Don’t Care

This is an option that I will not advise that you take but I will recommend nonetheless. If you think you still have a chance at making him change, you can decide to do this. 

If he stays out late the next time without calling you, make sure he’s home the next day, then go out with a friend and probably sleep over at your friend’s place without telling him or calling him. 

He will probably be jealous and hurt if he still loves you and you will have a chance to let him know his faults if he asks you why you did that. 

If your man really wants you out, he wouldn’t bother if you stayed out late all week. He might even use that occasion to break up with you. 

So, before you do this, be sure he still loves you and he only needs a little jealousy trigger to come to his senses. You might succeed in getting your man back. But, this is a long trail. 

Dump Him

Of course, this should be your last option. You must not try all the options above before dumping him, you only have to realize when you need to dump him first before he does that. 

You must really take up the first option here before doing this. Because you need all the love to leave a guy you love. Dump him, living your life. You will do better without him.

He probably wanted you out anyway. So, do him the favor of dumping him yourself before he gets to that.

Dumping him means that you must have a house of your own or have a friend you can go stay with for the moment. You might even want to go back to your parents if you can. 


Your boyfriend Stays out late and doesn’t call you because he doesn’t love and respect you, he is no more interested in you, he is hiding something from you or he was with another woman. 

You only have to find out the truth and take action accordingly. If he is doing that out of disrespect, you should know that no man deserves to disrespect you at all. 

Before you do anything about this, choose to love yourself first so that you can have the courage to leave him if you want to. 

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