Dating is not like marriage. Perhaps, my reservations regarding the issue are what brought you to this post…you’re seeking answers.
Is your boyfriend being hard-headed regarding his resolve that you’ll have to be wearing 5″ heels daily and this idea of his doesn’t sit right with you?
If that’s the case, then my assertion that dating is not like marriage makes absolute sense. In this case, you have the prerogative of choice but before, I know you want to know the meaning of his rules.
In this article, I’ll be discussing what it means when your boyfriend makes such injunctions and how you can go about it. Happy reading!
5 Possible Reasons Why?
For your boyfriend to insist you were a high heel measuring 5″ in height shows that he has a special interest in such footwear. Regardless, it is still not enough reason to subject you to that.
Is he planning other things? Perhaps, he’s trying to conform to a particular fashion sense at the expense of your convenience. Well, we don’t know until we discover his plausible reasons in this section of the post.
Without further ado, let’s get into the meat of this part which exposits on 5 possible reasons why your boyfriend insists you wear 5” heels every day.
- It could be that he wants to maintain a given social status
- It is likely a case of severely poor self-image transferred to you
- It is a clear indication that he’s a dictator, manipulative, and narcissist
- It could be he has a shoe fetish; a big one at that
- It could be he’s still obsessed with his ex
It Could Be That He Wants to Maintain a Given Social Status
The very first thing that should come to your mind when your boyfriend recurrently tells you to wear high heels, with at least 5” is that he’s after some kind of validation.
It makes even more sense if he does this almost every time you guys want to go out together, for probably a date or something else.
It could be that your boyfriend has an image to protect and he wants to keep appearing a certain way in the eyes of people.
It could even be he bragged about your false height to someone and now has to make you put up with the act for more than appropriate time.
Or, he’s tall and you’re short which could be a subject of trolls from either his friends or people around. All of these is just an act to continue projecting a certain image to the general public without considering if you’re cool with it or not.
It Is Likely a Case of Severe Poor Self-Image Transferred to You
If you’re dating someone whose regard for self is so poor that they depend on what people say to feel themselves.
This factor resembles the previous one but the only difference here is that instead of the person seeking only validation, they also tend to rub it on others.
In light of this, your boyfriend who insists that you’ll be wearing such high heels every day could just be someone who has a poor self-image but decides to transfer it to you.
Perhaps, in his mind, he thinks making you conform to a certain way of dressing will increase your value in the eyes of people, then it turns this rubs off on him as he’s your boyfriend.
He’s sort of using you as bait to gain confidence, even if it is the littlest of them.
It Is a Clear Indication That He’s a Dictator, Manipulative, and Narcissist
One thing you should know and realize is that a guy can tell his girlfriend which dress or footwear he wants her to put on. It is both an act of love and a way to make sure his girlfriend doesn’t appear immodest in the eyes of people.
This act is usually done as a form of suggestion, but as soon as it becomes a mandatory daily norm then something is amiss.
With that said; your boyfriend can detect to you what footwear he thinks looks good on you. However, it becomes an act of extreme dictatorship if he imposes it on you to wear the same height of heel every day.
If that’s the case, then the reason for his imposition is nothing but an expression of the beast he is. He’s not only manipulative; he’s also a chronic dictator and a narcissist.
With this as the reason for his actions; you might want to rethink your plans to commit to such a boyfriend. His action shows that he can be a perpetrator of domestic violence if you fail to act according to his stipulations, thereby endangering your life.
It Could Be He Has A Shoe Fetish; A Big One at That
The topic of sensuality is a deep one and a lot of people have different things that turn them on in person.
While some people fall in love with another person’s personality, some get so connected to someone because of how the person smells. Nevertheless, in this case, the determining factor here is a person’s appearance.
This is because your boyfriend might’ve imposed the same height of the heel on you every day. After all, he feels it turns him on whenever he sees you.
In this instance, we can conclude that your boyfriend is a massive shoe/feet fetish. This means he’s too attracted to what someone wears on their feet (more like a sneaker-head, but with heels in women).
It Could Be He’s still obsessed with His Ex
For your boyfriend to be specific with how high he wants the heels to be shows that he has some kind of affinity with either the number or there’s a personality behind it.
Perhaps, his ex whom he had a long past was a big fan of heels and due to the time they spent together, he became excessively acquainted with her lifestyle down to her fashion.
If this is the case, then telling you to wear 5″ heels every day is a way of relinquishing the memories of his ex through you.
This can be a laudable reason, especially if this very ex is late and he can’t help but talk about her or accidentally mention her name sometimes.
What to Do?
Having explained to you the 5 plausible reasons why your boyfriend would insist you wear 5″ heels every day; we are moving on to the next phase of this post.
The next phase has to be what you need to do when your boyfriend mandates you to put on such high heels daily.
Even before you practically start acting toward whatever you want to do in this regard, you need to tread with absolute caution. However, let’s delve into this post properly.
- You don’t have to feel defeated
- You have to evaluate if you’re comfortable or not
- You try to have a conversation about it
- You should be assertive as to your choice of dress or fashion
- You should reconsider the workability of the relationship
You Don’t Have to Feel Defeated
One thing you should know is that in this condition, you may be pushed to the wall enough to make you feel defeated.
The mandate your boyfriend placed on this rule of his can be so overwhelming that you may start feeling helpless sometimes. But you don’t have to allow for such.
In that regard, I present to you…the first tip on what you should do when your boyfriend insists you wear 5″ heels every day. That first tip is not to feel defeated no matter what!
You should take your mind off any sort of depression tendency or helplessness. This is because your failure to do that will trigger more adverse consequences, and give him the anchor to be in total control of your life.
You Have to Evaluate if you’re Comfortable or Not
Are you comfortable wearing 5″ heels every day? You may be comfortable wearing heels every day, but 5″? I doubt that.
I also think that this discomfort is the reason you’re searching for the reason for his actions and what to do about it. If you’re not comfortable like I suppose, take the next step below.
You Try to Have a Conversation About It
Since it’s clear that you don’t like wearing exactly 5″ heels every day, you should try to initiate a conversation about this with your boyfriend.
To do this, you need to pick and circumstance and mood that can get him to revoke his stance on the issue. It could be during a hot make-out between you two or a bright summer morning when everyone feels calm.
Finding the perfect moment to lodge your complaints is paramount, just as it is good for you to know how to present them which is our next tip.
You Should Be Assertive as to Your Choice of Dress or Fashion
Emotional blackmail is one thing that can ruin your chance to talk your boyfriend out of his imposition on you. I had to mention this because I know he’s going to try to use that on you.
When he does, you have to be assertive about your choice of fashion and stand by what you say. After all, you own your body and can do with it as you wish.
You Should Reconsider the Workability of the Relationship
If it looks like you’re not getting a positive response or reaction from him, you need to start reconsidering whether or not your affair with him will move on. This is because he’s clearly making you his prisoner and unfortunately, you can’t talk him out of it.
This will be in the case of him being obsessed with an ex so much, that he imposes on you to wear high heels of a certain height to help him relive the memories of this person, all in your ignorance.
As the last option here, you have to be critical with your thoughts as you might be putting an end to your relationship with him. However, when you choose to stay you’ll have to deal with the effects of your actions which I’ll be discussing next.
What Happens When You Wear High Heels Too Much?
Wearing heels is fashionable, but when done in excess has an adverse effect. This means when you give in to the imposition of your boyfriend to wear 5” heels every day, you could be setting yourself up for a health challenge.
A lot of people wear high heels almost every time they step out of the house without knowing what comes with it. What happens when you wear high heels too much may include, foot pain or even the inability to walk properly in another type of footwear. Here are my findings.
- It results in ankle instability
- It increases the spinal curvature at the upper back region of your body
- It can lead to severe lower back pain
- It can cause foot pain
- It constricts blood vessels
It Results in Ankle Instability
Wearing heels for a long period can cause ankle instability. This is a condition where your ankles feel unusually weak to carry the rest of your body steadily. This even affects how you walk in other footwear.
It Increases the Spinal Curvature at the Upper Back Region of Your Body
Too much use of high heels can make your spine curve at a degree that it shouldn’t. The upper region of your back is prone to this defect, so it can happen over time.
It Can Lead To Severe Lower Back Pain
An additional adverse effect of wearing high heels every time is severe lower back pain. The abnormal curvature of your spine in the upper region of your back pushes pressure to the lower region of your back thereby causing severe pain.
It Can Cause Foot Pain
Wearing high heels for a long time can also cause foot pain. This is more likely to happen with heels that do not allow your foot to sit well on them. If the balance is bad, over time you’ll develop pain there.
It Constricts Blood Vessels
There are blood vessels transporting blood and other biological components from your heart to the rest of your body, including your feet.
Wearing high heels makes these vessels narrower, thereby allowing little or no blood to pass through. This can cause temporary paralysis in your feet.
Conclusion
You probably didn’t feel comfortable wearing high heels every day as your boyfriend says, and you needed answers.
Here in this article, I’ve saved you the hassle of looking around or asking people by providing you with all you need to know about your circumstance.
Starting with the reasons for his imposition of what you need to do, I carefully explained things to you. To add icing to the cake, I also walked you through the effects of wearing high heels for too long.
I’m sure you no longer have a hard time making informed decisions concerning your issue as this post serves you right.
In light of any questions or suggestions, I indulge you to make use of the comment box below to let us know.