If your boyfriend gets on chaturbate to wank, it doesn’t always mean a sign of unhealthy intimate life or lack of desire for you.
It may mean a sign that he has an erection that needs dealing with.
But possible meanings to why your boyfriend goes on that website are beyond this perspective.
Chaturbate is a website where live webcam performances made by individual webcam models and couples are displayed. It typically features bareness and sensual displays.
The reason why your boyfriend gets on chaturbate may be that he has a higher-than-normal mating drive, or it has become a hobby or other form of entertainment, to deal with boredom, to survive a long-distance relationship, or due to peer pressure.
But it still goes beyond these. Read on to discover common reasons why guys visit chaturbate and what you can do about the situation.
To begin with, a recent survey has shown that 22 percent of women consider it cheating when their boyfriend watches this type of content, or its variations, without her.
So it is normal that this habit of his makes you disturbed, if not insecure. Generally speaking, guys go on to chaturbate for a variety of reasons.
5 Reasons Why Your Boyfriend Goes On Chaturbate
The average justification to visit chaturbate, for guys, is that it is a means through which they relieve themselves and keep themselves from going crazy with the desire to make love.
As his girlfriend, it is understandable to find the webcam thing too creepy, given that, unlike explicit content; there is a live interaction and personal relationship (though frivolous) in chaturbate that brings it closer to cheating.
While you’ve probably considered talking to him about it to reach some sort of consensus, you should equip your knowledge base with possible reasons behind his habit to help you have a better-shaped perspective of the matter.
Now, the possible reason why your boyfriend gets on chaturbate:
1. Higher-than-normal mating drive
You may not have noticed that your boyfriend has a mating drive that is higher than normal. This could account for the primary reason why he watches webcam girls.
A high mating drive in your boyfriend that could cause him to get on chaturbate may be due to changes in hormone levels, his age, or an increase in exercise.
Another way you can be sure he watches webcam girls because of his high drive is when you notice he has lower stress levels or stopping certain medications both of which can contribute to this increase in males and females.
While having a high mating drive is a natural part of being human, it could cause an imbalance in a relationship.
Sometimes, this possible reason in discussion is caused by his puberty or aging journey.
For instance, testosterone production increases 10 times in adolescent boys, hence the increase in arousal or interest in mating at that period in development.
As such, seeing them glued to chaturbate is not far-fetched during this period.
Generally, younger men may have a higher mating drive than older adults. On the brighter side, some guys may experience a boost in libido if they find themselves in a healthy and better intimate relationship than previous ones.
In other words, if you’re mating with him is a good experience, then it’s likely going to make him want to do more of it. If this is not always possible given your level of mating drive, then he resorts to the website.
2. A hobby or form of entertainment
Another possible reason why your boyfriend logs on to the Chaturbate website could be that he finds it as a form of entertainment or that the browsing habit has developed to become his hobby.
In other words, there may be no further or deeper connection with the girls he engages with on those platforms, but he just counts it as romance-themed entertainment – it is normal not to be cool with this as his girlfriend.
Just like romance content, some guys find it entertaining to watch ladies displaying themselves which does justice to their immediate turgidity at the time.
Usually, if the reason why he visits Chaturbate is simply for entertainment, then it shouldn’t be something he does frequently.
You don’t have to figure this out by snooping into his browsing history. If the issue has gone out of hand, and you can no longer tolerate it, then it is likely that entertainment is not the reason why he gets on Chaturbate.
3. To deal with boredom
Watching Chaturbate, for your boyfriend, may help deal with loneliness and boredom. This is one of the common reasons many guys find it more comfortable to talk about it with their spouse.
There are many ways to relieve stress or pass the time, but not every option is a great idea.
Your boyfriend might have considered watching these webcam girls as a means to take out boredom, but to some others, it is worse than being internet junk food.
What drives him to get on those websites and even pay to access the content there? Aside from being hungry, angry, having a bad day at work, or feeling rejected, simply being bored may be the specific trigger that causes him to crave the browsing habit.
If his trained response to boredom is to turn to watch live videos of ladies being romantic, then he primarily does it to pass time.
As a solution in this regard, it is better to get him to pick something else to do instead. You could give him a cheap guitar so he starts learning some basic chords, or give him daily drawing prompts so he practices art to pass time.
4. To survive a long-distance relationship
If you two are in a long-distance relationship (LDR), and he’s seeking romantic gratification, consider it a possible reason why he goes on the webcam website to satisfy the need for in-person affection.
There are many ways to deal with desire in a long-distance relationship, and perhaps, he sees watching a live webcam of uncovered ladies as one of them while you are far away to fill that gap.
I don’t see anything inherently wrong with any of the parties in LDR using online material or sources – as long as it helps avoid seeking physical contact that is gross cheating.
If this is the main reason why he gets on chaturbate, then it means the browsing habit helps him have that physical release so he can get about his days as most guys can’t do this by their mere thoughts alone.
As long as he’s not physically meeting with the webcam ladies, and it is not at a detriment to your relationship with him, I think this is a reasonable and quite justifiable cause.
Meanwhile, there are other ways of being romantic with each other in a long-distance relationship. For instance, you both could decide to go on romantic phone texting only that it takes a level of expertise to be able to verbalize carnal words.
I think expecting your partner not to watch explicit content or its variations such as visiting chaturbate, especially when you are in a long-distance relationship, is purely inconsiderate.
It makes it seem as though you are seeking to unfairly control your partner for no reason.
5. Due to peer pressure
For many guys, the browsing habit could also be a result of peer pressure.
For example, your boyfriend goes on Chaturbate because his friend does the same, and he claims it improves his intimate chemistry with his girlfriend.
In some of the cases I’ve been privileged to intervene in, I discovered that watching intimate content and getting on chaturbate, for many young guys, can flare from an act of mere curiosity to pressure from friends.
So study his peers to see if they are likely the reason why he engages in such a habit. In this case, he isn’t doing it essentially for intimacy gratification (though maybe a byproduct derived) but primarily due to the pressure to do something just because others are doing it (or claim they are).
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Is It Okay For Him To Get On Chaturbate?
Unlike p*rn where he just looks at videos, getting on a webcam is different. However, if it’s not interactive, I don’t see that such a distinction exists in regular p*rn.
Your boyfriend getting on Chaturbate is Okay. However, there are exceptions to prove such wrongs which are:
- If he won’t get romantic with you
- If you are now in a rough patch because he shows reduced interest in you
- If he is planning on meeting these webcam women physically
- If he continually visits Chaturbate website even after you tell him not to
Then, it is not okay for your boyfriend to chaturbate.
If you have observed that he spends too much time and energy on chaturbate, it is a separate and valid concern and should be worried about getting him to stir away.
Also, can you assess how the habit has affected your intimate lives? If it isn’t as brilliant as it should be, then it could mean that it is not Okay for him to be consistent on Chaturbate.
For example, your intercourse could be amazing for 3-6 months with fulfilling activity but becomes less than once a week after. It becomes a valid reason for a complaint to suggest that it is not Okay.
I wouldn’t advise that you drown yourself in the thoughts that he’s not getting satisfied by you. That is not how wanking works for guys.
You may think that he is looking for girls he likes on Chaturbate, as opposed to content where he’s not looking specifically for attractive ladies, but looking for attractive people engaged in int^rcourse is the point of content and all its extensions.
What to Do When He Gets on Chaturbate?
Some ladies do not see any reason to be disturbed that their boyfriend gets on Chaturbate.
But if you don’t want to spend the rest of your life in a relationship with someone that requires you to supplement their life with webcam girls, then you need to be ready to leverage the meanings behind this habit to address the situation.
When your boyfriend gets on Chaturbate, the last thing you should do is wallow in your resentment. If you have been snooping, you need to stop and have a frank conversation with him about it.
In other words, there is no other best way to tackle your disturbance over him getting on Chaturbate than to bring it up with him in a conversation.
One important reason why you should talk to your boyfriend about it first is that you need to find out why exactly he was doing that, which could be any of the reasons above. You may be able to do something about it or you may be part of the reason.
Meanwhile, as you attempt to do this, you want to be sure you had a legitimate reason for snooping, perhaps being on his laptop when you discovered he engages with webcam girls.
If the event that led to the discovery was an unfair invasion of ‘privacy’ then you need to drop the webcam angle while bringing the matter up and just talk about your love life.
If the habit is persistent despite many efforts to resolve it by having a conversation, and it poses a threat to your love life, then the best option would be to get rid as you can’t change people, ultimately.
You need to be with someone who respects your feelings and your body while nourishing your damaged self-confidence.
Finally
In the above article, we have seen the different possible reasons why your boyfriend gets on Chaturbate. For some ladies, it is no deal breaker as they even encourage engaging in the browsing habit with their partner.
For others, it is an uncomfortable thing to live with. If you have no issues with your boyfriend watching intimate content, then this should not be a big deal.
However, when it begins to lead to him not being romantic with you, reduced interest in you, planning to meet webcam girls physically, and continual habit despite communicating your reservations about it with him, then you should be concerned.
I hope you found this helpful, love.
My boyfriend says he watches chaturbate but doesn’t pay to watch/communicate with the girls on the site just watches the free stuff like porn. If so is that the same as porn? Am I over reacting with such? Is this normal? He thinks I’m being silly for confronting him for it. It just makes me feel like I’m not good enough. Why look up girls on that site even if he says he’s not paying for it when he can have me to please him. Any opinions? Makes me feel uncomfortable for him to watch girls masturbate and get turned on by that when he has me. But if he says he’s not paying for chaturbate apparently it’s not cheating and the same as porn but don’t get why he uses it and doesn’t just use porn then if so.