It can set you on edge when you are being stared at, intensely. We’ve all been at the receiving end of an intense gaze from someone on the street, a baby on the bus, or a kid at the park who has suddenly found interest in our face.
It’s worse when it’s someone who’s in a position to fire or give you a raise – your boss.
If it goes on for an extended period, from one day to the other, it is impossible not to become worried.
You become curious and wonder why. If you currently experience this, read this article to find which of the reasons below best answer your question.
12 reasons why your boss stares at you intensely
- You aren’t focusing on your job so your boss focuses on you
- Your boss stares to confirm the rumors about you
- You are a model worker
- Your boss is daydreaming
- You are stunning
- You hold unpopular beliefs
- Your boss wants to fire you
- A warning that you aren’t mixing much
- You have great skin, or not
- Your boss struggles with trust issues
- You are a member of a minority group
- Your boss would like to get low
1. You Aren’t Focusing On Your Job So Your Boss Focuses On You
The ethics or rules of your workplace allows you to make and receive phone calls, and have friends visit you. Your boss is nice like that.
If this is the reality of your job then you can assume that your boss is a nice guy who loves to see his employees happy.
Is it possible that now he sees you aren’t focused on your job but rather than directly and verbally voice his concerns, he just gives you this intense stare and hopes that you’d catch his hint?
This is very possible. I’ve heard a conversation where someone said all she has to do to get back on track while at work was look over his computer at her boss.
Just one hard from Mrs. Hardcastle – her boss – and she logs out of Facebook. Some bosses avoid verbal confrontations, others leave you a note. Others stare intensely.
2. Your Boss Stares To Confirm The Rumors About You
The office floor is an evergreen grapevine. Rumors, she-says-he-says, rivalries, competition, all of these are some of the human dynamics you have to deal with.
Then there’s the new nickname they call the boss that only a few of you and your colleagues know.
Then you are one employee who’s proud of his or her work. Your integrity is never in question.
But what if you are alone in this estimation of yourself? What if your boss has heard about that one time you didn’t treat a customer well?
his may be why he now stares intensely, calculating, considering how you measure up to the pedestal he once placed you.
If you are in sales or a cashier then you are exposed to customers often. Your boss may now stare to see if what he’s heard about the way you serve customers is true.
But why doesn’t he just watch you through the security cameras? Well, it’s his prerogative to watch from wherever he chooses.
3. You Are A Model Worker
Here’s where you have to put a little more qualification to the manner of the stare. Some intense stares may carry a tinge of curiosity or interest.
If you look back on your history on the job with your boss and you find nothing to worry about in your relationship with him or the company, then it may be that your boss finds you a great employee to work with.
He may stare to find out what makes you so good at your job or may want to witness firsthand how you treat customers, arrange your file and do so forth. There can be a number of reasons along this line.
A woman who works in the packaging section of a department store once caught her boss staring at her intensely for most of the morning.
After making sure it had nothing to do with her dress or hair, she later found out the boss was amazed by how fast she packed and especially loved how she talked with the other coworkers. Her boss wanted to know if she was Mormon.
4. Your Boss Is Daydreaming
You don’t suppose your boss doesn’t have his or her own fantasies? Come on, now.
It’s midday and the day’s work has progressed, here your boss is, dreaming about the coming vacation with his wife and kids in Hawaii or some other place where he can get away from his office, the business, and especially you the employees.
So, there he is, dreaming about it all, but rather than stare at you, he’s looking through you.
So rather than see you, your boss sees a blue ocean, white sand, palm trees and his lovely wife lounging beside him. You just never totally know with bosses.
To find out if this theory is true, move your head and see if his eyes follow you. Or make a gesture like, ‘Boss, is there a problem?’ then hope he doesn’t see you.
Your boss may simply be focusing on his thoughts than on you.
5. You are Stunning
Another reason why your boss stares at you intensely is that your boss finds you extremely attractive.
Although this isn’t always a good thing, it is very common in workplaces.
You may get this intense stare in snatches at a time. If you’ve gotten compliments about your looks from others, perhaps your boss unabashedly also believes you should be complimented.
If he feels it is inappropriate to say it openly he may just make up for it by staring.
Another way to look at it is, that your boss hasn’t always thought of you this way before until now and only now notices it.
It may be something about your dress, your hair, or the way you smile recently since you got that engagement ring.
There’s the possibility that he’s heard about the engagement and thinks, ‘how did I not see how beautiful Alice is?’
The other side of the coin is, that now that he finds you attractive, he may want to take you out to lunch, or dinner after work.
While the decision is solely yours to make, always remember that office romance, especially with the boss, isn’t always the best activity to be engaged in.
6. You Hold Unpopular Beliefs
We often associate how people behave with their religious beliefs, their political ideologies, or social leanings.
If someone says something we find politically off, we may scoff at them when we find they are Communist in their thoughts.,
So that last office discussion where you made a passing remark about your beliefs may have stayed with your boss and after getting more information about these beliefs of yours, now finds you fascinating. Hence the stare.
You just might represent a subset of society that your boss finds repulsive, interesting or downright odd.
Whichever one you are, usually it doesn’t take long before your fate is decided on that job. And this leads us to the next probable reason.
7. Your Boss Wants To Fire You
This may sound unlikely, especially because bosses hardly stare at the employee they are about to cut loose.
They invite you into their office and lay it all out before you, all the beautiful reasons why the business now needs to replace you with a better fit, and that they are sure you have a brighter future ahead of you.
But if your boss stares intensely at you, he probably considers you a very despicable worker and just wanted to let you know just how much he looks forward to giving you the ax.
Now, he stares at you with the off chance that you’d say something rude, give him all the reasons he needs to sack you.
Perhaps it’s better to be on good behavior and keep your head down, who knows, something might change.
8. A Warning That You Aren’t Mixing Much
If your boss isn’t looking to give you the sack letter, his stare may be a warning to get out of your shell and get social.
This is especially if he finds you odd. And if this oddness is the result of your personal convictions – morally, or politically. If you keep to yourself at work, you may even get this stare from other employees too.
You might have to check with them first before you conclude that this is the reason. Some insight into how others see you may help dispel your suspicions.
Loners attract attention sometimes, the same thing they probably are trying to avoid in the first place.
9. You Have Great Skin, Or Not
You aren’t particularly good-looking at work. You just happen to take good care of yourself. Your skin glows, is smooth, and very attractive.
If this is true, then you will likely get the stare of a keen-eyed boss. To know if this is as close to his reason as any, look at him too and see what happens.
If he smiles, looks away, or beckons you over for a chat, then there’s nothing to worry about.
Then again, watch for the expression in his eyes. If he takes his eyes off your face and settles on your neck and follows that up with your exposed arms, then it is your skin and it has nothing to do with your job.
On the other hand, your boss may stare intensely if he thinks your skin looks terrible. The same test will help here too. Does he take his eyes off your face when you stare back?
Does he stare at other parts of your body, like your arms? He may consider verbal notification of your health inappropriate so he stares.
10. Your Boss Struggles With Trust Issues
Trust issues for you, that is. Your boss may stare at you because he suddenly feels hiring you was a mistake. Does this sound farfetched?
Well, so does staring at someone intensely. You have to be open to the plentiful possibilities that could cause you to attract your boss’ attention so.
For example, it is possible that he is not happy about your presence at the job and all he can do is stare.
Perhaps you should stare back and see if he engages you in a staring match. If this happens, be concerned.
11. You Are a Member Of A Minority Group
An English guy I know who worked in an African country once told me how one of his superiors would stare at him for minutes on end.
It got so bad he had to ask this superior to level with him. Turns out the English dude reminds his boss of Lord Lugard, the English man whose efforts became instrumental to the forming of a country in Africa.
Apparently, this boss didn’t like my English friend for this reason. The English don’t belong to a minority group or race but this illustrates how belonging to a certain race or group can attract some attention, positive or negative.
Maybe your boss doesn’t like people of color that much or he isn’t comfortable with them holding the position you do.
To be sure though, you may have to ask around about this boss before you form a concrete opinion of his leaning.
One thing is for sure, racism on the job is real and you just might be about to receive a dose of it.
12. Your Boss Would Like To Get Low
Finally, it is possible that your boss finds you appealing and would love to get in the sack with you.
This isn’t a strange thing at workplaces where a boss develops a romantic interest in female employees. They would often transmit this desire by staring.
The internet is awash with videos and books that teach that if you want to get a woman’s attention, or you want to trigger intimate feelings in her, just stare, intensely.
Does this work? I guess you’d have to prove this theory in your case.
Bottom Line
What’s most important is not coming on too strong in situations like this. Do not make the mistake of bringing accusations hastily.
If the act continues to the point where even other employees confirm that your boss does stare at you, then you might have to ask your boss.
Or you may ignore him and go on with your work and life. Depending on the nature of your organization’s leadership structure and the severity of the issue, you may approach the matter officially by making a formal report to the appropriate authority in the company.
This is especially important if this intense staring is accompanied by other inappropriate actions.