So, you’ve been chatting with this guy for a while over the phone and he seems to have passed a good impression over texts and calls. Now and finally, it is time for the very first date.
However, he is inviting you to his house. What could this possibly mean, and what is the best way to respond?
Well, first dates are about making impressions, getting to know each other, and the beginnings of earning trust, among other meeting-for-the-first-time things.
A guy asking you to come over on a first date might make you excited, or it could make you feel quite nervous – depending on how you feel about him and how comfortable you are with him.
Based on experience and average tales of ladies on popular love forums, the common meaning/reason behind a guy inviting you over on the first date could be that he wants to take the relationship to the next level, wants to become intimate, wants to win your trust, or there’s no enough money to afford public dates.
Aside from these possible reasons, a guy inviting you to his house on the first date may mean that he feels he has the privacy and comfort, or that he is testing you to figure out your reservations in that regard.
The latter situation is rare, as most guys would ask you to come over because they want you to.
With these divergent possibilities, the real question is: what could be his intention in inviting you to his house on the first date?
Let’s dive deeper into these different reasons to see how any of each could apply to your situation and the best way you can respond to the invitation.
5 Meanings to When a Guy Invites You over On First Date
In situations like this, it is usually extremely tempting to jump to overthinking or rushed conclusions.
However, if you can thoroughly process the possible meanings behind a guy’s invitation to his house on the first date, you will be able to clearly identify his intention and then respond accordingly as per your stances.
1. He wants to take the relationship to the next level
In a bid to boost the relationship to the next level, the guy may deliberately want you to come to his house on the first date. This could take two variations.
The first is that coming to his house on the first date is an opportunity to meet with his family and get used to his environment. In this way, your bond is getting stronger.
The second possibility under this reason is that he may have plans to make a move on you, with the hope that something will lead to another that will make you both see reasons to make love on the first date.
There are high chances that he must have pondered how you will process the invitation to his house for your first date.
In a way, the idea that you will be meeting for a date at his house subconsciously prepares your mind that he might be interested in making a move, or any other gesture geared towards taking the relationship to another level. This idea leads us to the next point.
2. He wants to get intimate with you
A guy’s invitation to his house on the first date may mean that he wants to get intimate with you, not only based on establishing a closer connection (knowing each other’s address) but also to make love with you.
There are sweet stories of how romantic first dates led to foreplay and intense, fulfilled lovemaking. He may have hopes of that happening and has suggested inviting you over for a first date on that notion. But not everyone is comfortable with such.
If this speculation resonates with you, you have to be careful at the same time not to make costly assumptions. Not all invitations to a guy’s house should pass the impression that he wants to make out.
If you can study your tone of communication before he asked you out on a date, then you may be able to figure out the reason why he picked his house as the location.
3. He might see it as another way to win your trust
By asking you to come to his house, especially given that it is the very first date, might establish a level of trust between you two.
This could be the intention of the guy when he made the invitation. One of the impressions you want to pass across on a first date is transparency.
For a guy to be willing to show you his family, where he lives, and probably people he hangs out with, it may mean that he sees it as a way to win your trust on the first date.
One of the ways you can figure out if this is the actual reason why he had invited you to his house is by studying the events that led to him asking you out in the first place.
The first date is also about knowing about each other beyond what has been shared over the phone or at other times.
And so, having you in his house on the first date, to him, may appear like an effective way to do that beyond the questions and answers over the table.
4. No enough money for public dates
As It-doesn’t-matter as this may sound, the unavailability of enough bucks to foot the bills at the intended location for the first date can make a guy resort to inviting you to his house for the date instead.
The first date is always hyped. Both parties want to ensure they don’t pass an impression that is below expectation or ‘standard’.
And so, instead of unnecessary embarrassment, it is pocket-friendly to have the date at home, perhaps watching movies or a simple dinner.
The issue of who to pay the bills on the first date will remain a matter of contention. To avoid any of these, and to cut down on costs including transportation, food, and drinks, the guy may see inviting you over as a low-budget but creative way to still make the day count without splurging too much.
5. For more privacy and comfort
Inviting you over to his house for the first date may mean that the guy is convinced that it will guarantee the privacy and comfort that is needed to make the date a memorable one.
Most times, those destinations or locations for first date ideas can be distracting as you’ll likely find lovers all over the place too.
But being alone together in his house may mean that he values the comfort and privacy of you both and won’t want any interference as you both communicate to know each other more.
While you may not buy into the idea, spending time with your date alone in a house helps to narrow the attention to your date alone, and blocks out environmental attractions that could potentially ruin the date.
Should You Go To His House Per His Invite?
When a guy invites you to his house on the first date, he must have pondered that the invitation will pass a certain impression that will trigger your nervousness or otherwise delight.
If you have met with him in the past and are comfortable with him, there is no reason to turn him down. His intentions may be opposed to your assumptions.
However, if you have mixed feelings, it is better to politely decline and explain why to him, offering preferred location ideas.
Do not feel pressured to accept his invitation. If he is truly the right guy, he will be understanding and will try to force you into something that you are not comfortable with.
The decision on whether to go or not depends on you and how you feel about the invitation.
Examine the conversation between you and the guy that led to him asking you out, and then the possible meaning behind choosing his house as explained above.
If A Guy Sends You An Home Invite For a Second Date, Is This A Red Flag?
The primary objective of a second date is that the first date has served as an avenue for you both to get to know each other, and so this sequel should be for advanced talks or activities that will strengthen your bond with the person.
Now, if a guy invites you to his house on the second date, it is not always a red flag, considering the intentions. However, there is a high chance he wants to make a move and become intimate.
Though his intentions may be just to hang out, you can expect things to graduate to the next level in terms of intimacy.
What Does It Mean If A Guy Invites You To His House To Watch a Movie?
Generally speaking, inviting someone to watch a movie with you is a way of showing friendship. So, if a guy requests to see a movie with you at his house, he probably likes you or regards you as a buddy.
It is not fair to always instantly take it the wrong way whenever a guy invites you to his house to watch a movie.
On the flip side of the coin, the guy may have an inappropriate intention toward you. Yes, he is aware you will ponder about it, but the thought of Netflix and chilling with him alone subconsciously prepares your mind for the intimate intention he wants both of you to have.
If this is something you don’t want, you can easily figure it out before it’s too late by observing his recent behaviors and persistent requests to be with you alone.
Another way you can know that the meaning is not purely to hang out is that, after you’ve declined, and you haven’t heard from a guy after a few days, then he probably wasn’t interested in the first place.
Important things to consider before heading to a guy’s house on an invite
Suppose a guy invites you to his house. In that case, you want to be intentional about the things you do or consider before and while at his place, especially if this will be the first time.
From experience, I can list out these six things below that I consider important for any lady to take note of before going to a guy’s house on an invite.
While some are precautionary measures, others are to ensure that your visit is not ruined or overshadowed by boredom.
Consider making plans to engage in fun activities while at his house
Before heading to his place upon invitation, have in mind some games, topics to discuss, or other indoor activities that you both can participate in to avoid boredom.
Wear something comfortable
Your appearance at his place can determine a lot of things. You want to make sure you are wearing something comfortable, not too extravagant, and not too basic.
If it is an invite for the first date, clothes that enhance cleavages may not be ideal. The bottom line is don’t wear anything that will make you feel uncomfortable later on.
You should expect to meet his parents or roommates
Even though he lives alone, be prepared to meet someone at home with him. Your preparation could be required in the area of your dressing, timing, and mood. The possibility of this happening is high on first dates.
Along with making plans for fun activities, it would be nice to bring along drinks or a snack
This is also encouraged when visiting anyone, not just a guy. It is a sign that you have them in mind, and the invitation is appreciated.
When heading to a guy’s house upon invitation, it is usually advised to pack up pepper spray
This is a precautionary measure should things go south and he attempts to move into you against your will. Generally, pepper spray is a low-key weapon that can come in handy for situations that require self-defense.
Lastly, it is a wise thing to have a friend or family member aware of your trip to the guy’s house. You can even make plans with the person to call you at some point for safety purposes.